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Archive for the ‘animals’ Category

Autism in my family

Hi Fellow Auti people

I have had a bit of a rough trot lately… I have reached the end of my coping abilities…my patience is lost, my anger is noticeable, my frustration is at a level so high I think I have high blood pressure. I am doubting myself, my parenting, my capabilities, my intelligence, my mind.

Kim, 25, has moved back home, she is in a caravan in the backyard with her partner. She also came home with 2 cats. Guess where they live….in the house with me. Guess how much I pick up after THE FAMILY.

Patrick is now nearly 16 and he is huge…in height, popular and is hardly ever home. He goes to TAFE now, to become a mechanic,  much better than the failed public school system for him. He smokes….grrrrr. He doesnt come home…..grrrr. He doesnt really get into trouble, thank goodness. He did when he first started at TAFE, but he has settled down now and is doing the right thing there…he wants a trade, he wants a job…but….his attitude stinks.. He rings me and asks if he can go somewhere or stay overnight with a mate….and when I say no and why, perfectly reasonable of course, he refuses to come home anyway….so privileges are few and between. I am so over teen boy….size, noise, thumping through the house, temper, door slamming, swearing, resistance, abuse, smell, laziness, procrastination, more teen boys and more of all the above, disrespect, no food, no money, backyard full of car parts, dirty hand marks high up on the walls, and much much more.

I am so over….: cats, cat hair, cat in my face, cat on my lap, cat under my feet every time I move, cat crying, cat food, cat shit, cat diarrhea, cat furniture, cat food tins on the kitchen floor, broken vases, chewed phone cords, chewed computer cords, chewed artificial flower arrangements….cats; dishes…in the living room, in the bedrooms, in the front yard, in the backyard, in the sink, on the sink, piled up on the benches, unwashed, not in the cupboards, not clean, on the floor, on the benches, on the furniture, broken,  missing…dishes; smoking paraphernalia…: cigarette butts outside the back door, front door, in the yard everywhere, front and back, empty packs inside, outside, (I dont allow smokers in my home), tobacco pouches, tobacco dregs, filters, papers, lighters, no matches in my emergency stash, smell in the house, smokers….;

I get a cleaner in each fortnight, to help keep up with the floor mopping and bathroom cleaning, etc, that I cant keep up with myself, my arthritis and depression is a struggle. I work flat out for at least 2 hours before the cleaning lady comes to make the house clean and safe for the cleaner to work in…how ironic…so I am sick of having to hurt myself to do that. It sets my physical being back two days after the cleaner coming….no one helps me. Cleaning up the cat mess is NOT my responsibility, BUT, I have to make sure there are no poops anywhere for the cleaners health and safety; I am not the only person who cooks and uses dishes in the family, BUT, I am the only regular dish washer in the house; I dont leave dishes anywhere but on the sink, BUT, I am always picking dishes up from all over the house and yard; I take care of my belongings, BUT, no one else does. Everything in my house is dirty, untidy, trashed, cluttered, over run with animals.

I have my own pet, my little maltese x shih tzu, Brandy. He doesnt get my lap anymore, he has to fight for it. He doesnt settle. He has to wait to get his feed until the cats are out. He has to sleep on my bed, in my room, to get peace. He is always unsettled, getting up everytime he hears a cat move, someone else in the house. He is my little companion, but I feel so alone, so unsettled, so impatient with him often.

I am so alone and so depressed….Autism Sucks

Catch you next time

Dianne

 

Walking the animals

Hi Fellow Bloggers

I was on the phone to mum, discussing our family plans for emergencies. We do this regularly to keep ourselves on the ready. In our town we have in the last 2 years experienced bush-fires burning out an entire suburb, one person died in those fires and many people are still displaced. We have also experienced a cyclone that came from the top of Australia and wound its way down the country, inland, ending with us here in Bendigo, Victoria, causing flooding and destruction and still many people are not able to move back into their properties a year later. We have just been through a very tense, hot summer without a fire outbreak, but have been experiencing some very wild destructive storms, as long ago as a week. So, our emergency plan is quite relevant and you all know, that with Autistic families, being prepared is the best solution for managing our children in such times.

So here I am discussing the animals when Kimberly walked in and said ‘ rabbit, chimpanzee, tiger’ and giggled. Mum heard someone in the background say something about a tiger and was saying that yes it was possible that zoo’s could be disrupted in earthquakes and such, so animals like lions and tigers could be roaming free, therefore making it extra dangerous and that we should make sure our own animals were on leashes or carry baskets to keep them safe and secure. While mum was rambling on, not realizing what Kim has said…..I looked at Kim questioningly and she said ‘ I heard animals so I just added to it’ and giggled. By this time, Patrick had wandered in and said ‘ what are you laughing about?’

I explained that I was talking to Nanny about making sure our pets were leashed and in their carry baskets when we evacuate in an emergency, and then Kimmi said ‘ rabbit, chimp, tiger’ and how Nanny said that the animals in a zoo could escape if the emergency situation was bad enough, like an earthquake.

During that explanation to Patrick what was funny, mum had to go, so we said our goodbyes. Kim had picked up the phrase ‘having our pets on leashes’ and so started, animatedly, acting out having our pets on their leashes. It was very funny. She stood still with her hand down by her side and said ‘ this is Lulu’, our Red Kelpie x who is quiet and loyal and would just lie down until told to move. Then she demonstrated Brandy on a leash, our 1yo Maltese x Shih Tzu. Her arm was stretch out and was going all over the place, it was funny, because he is such an active happy little chap. Patrick got into the act too and had Booboo, our young tabby cat on a leash….his hand was going around his body and he was twisting around and then it shot off away from him….he is a very good actor, lol. Kim started on Booboo as well. Her hand went erratically for a few seconds then up above her head and she started saying ‘ here kitty kitty, come on down from there, come on kitty kitty’. It was hilarious.

I said what about Rachel’s (my sister) budgies? Kim said ‘ yeah, with little tiny harnesses around their bodies so their wings can still operate’…and demonstrated walking along with her two hands in the air moving erratically in the air, Then just as quick she changed to a rabbit jumping on the ground, moving along, then all of a sudden, both Kim and Pat stopped still and had their hand directly in front of them, not moving. They both cracked up laughing at the same time. A turtle! They stayed like that for a few minutes, they talked about things and were still in the same spot but their arm had extended a little more in front of them….they were both so so funny.

Well, it was Thursday and Thursday evening is our regular get together chat about what to do in an emergency, so we decided then to continue the discussion. We also put in a new plan to deal with the animals while they were both tuned in to that and our emergency plan discussion went really well. Both Pat and Kim took responsibility for their part in the plan and I was so glad to see their attitude working with the plan rather than in a negative way. Patrick’s usual response it ‘ Its not going to happen to us’ and Kim attitude is ‘ It wont get that bad’.

All in all, a good day Thursday

Cheers

Dianne

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